Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize