Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
People in love make me want to vomit
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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