remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
