Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
