I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
