just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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