his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
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