Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
kristin has been a bad kristin
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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