She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
