Having a random hookup so left but love u
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize