that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize
