Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
