he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
