My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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