Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
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