That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Randomize
