In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
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