Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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