this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
