Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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