You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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