got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
