Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Randomize
