Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
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