I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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