Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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