dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Randomize