so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
