He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Randomize
