The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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