youre lurking in front of me
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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