there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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