Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Randomize
