please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
