Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
We had to coat check the pizza.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
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