Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
