omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
where are you?
Hypothermia
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
