dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
