Its about making memories worth repressing
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
My bed smells like the plague
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Randomize
