I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
