I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
