Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
