so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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