How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
