i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize
