I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
