You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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