Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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