I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
