i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
