brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
